It is never too late to start teaching your children some important life lessons from such an early age. This begins with encouraging them to start thinking about loss and how that affects them and what it means. From an early age, it’s important to start understanding how the world works. It is a worry for children in today’s society because they have to deal with many more things than other generations have had to, with the added worry of social media and not feeling as if they’re fitting in. But when it comes to responsible conversations relating to death or loss, it can be tricky but it’s a really beneficial thing to do early on. Perhaps they will lose a grandparent and not understand so it’s good that they can feel as if they appreciate the cycle of life and that their loved one will always be with them.
Teach Them Gently About How To Deal With Loss
Everyone will grieve differently but It may seem a little morbid to discuss death with a child but if they have suffered loss, it’s possible that at any age during their childhood it could affect them. They may have to deal with loss at some point so firstly you must start with a simple conversation. Talk to them in a calm manner about death, about what to expect, and how they may feel – they may feel:
Children must be made to feel as if they are never alone because they too get anxiety. They must have a support network and you should also take time out to help them with learning about how people are born and die and that just because they are gone doesn’t mean that they are not always with them. This will assist them if something sudden should happen. It’s also important if they are a little older to let them know about the procedures that would happen after the loss of someone. Paperwork and insurance as well as funeral planning; none of this is easy but it can be made a little easier. This can be a stressful time and can affect the adults too. Children easily pick up on the tension. Trying to remain as calm and as normal as possible will help but talking to them every step of the way will be great. At least they are prepared, and forewarned is forearmed.
How to Deal with Loss as an Adult
When you deal with loss as an adult, it can be devastating. Children tend to easily bounce back, they are resilient and will be able to concentrate on their studies and friends again relatively quickly. There are many things to do that can help assist with the grieving process but there are also some important things to note when someone has died.
Looking at receiving their assets
If you have received the assets and you have been given the deceased person’s estate, it may be that you would like to look at selling the property. It is very important to look at hiring someone to help you value the house and any other property and then see how it could be sold easily. If the estate belongs to you and the relative had power of attorney, then everything rightfully belongs to you and you would not have to fight for it. If the deceased has any type of debts, this will be deducted from their estate and hinders the assets that you will receive so it’s best to note all of this and be aware of any outstanding debts that they have. Any remaining assets will be left to you following payment of their debt. If they have no estate then debts are dissolved and you will not have any entitlement to any rented accommodation or things that were not officially belonging to them. Other further assets may include their savings, money in their bank accounts, any insurance policies or pension schemes that they were paying into which you could get access to but would need the necessary details and information. You will also most likely have to pay some type of inheritance tax but this would be discussed with your lawyers and you would get the information needed. It can be very tricky indeed to get life back to normal after loss and it can take a toll on your mental health. You could forget the grieving process and have to focus on the responsibilities which aren’t good for you or anyone. You need to take care of yourself and realize that it is OK to grieve.
Deal with things in a fresher way
If you have someone’s ashes you may want to do something a little less traditional with them but equally as beautiful. Turning your loved one’s ashes into something incredibly beautiful can help with the healing process and it can also be something that you can keep forever. You can look at cremation jewelry in glass and these are beautiful items and keepsakes that you can cherish. These types of mementos are wonderful because they can aid with the mourning process and you can pass on these items to your family or kids to help them realize that even though their relative has died, they have been used to create something beautiful. Other people plant trees, which is a wonderful way to teach kids about the cycle of life and how humans can be put back into nature to help the planet. It’s important to remember to take that time for yourself and to spend time with your kids and tell them that you love them. You can heal together. Death is a part of life but it can be a big adjustment. By keeping your loved ones close and remembering the deceased, you can always remember that things are going to improve. Take the time that you need to heal, leave work, and join groups; try to sleep and eat well and life will get back to normal.
About the Author
This article is written by a contributing author.
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